responsibility

i might just have to throw a really big hissy fit....

forgiveness, my ass! that's just permission to do it again.
no. hell no. no fucking way.

no compromises.
no meeting in the middle.
not this time, dammit.
not ever again.

no more blaming.
you fucked up and you know it.
own it.

inspiration

another comment (moderated/deleted) inspired by david miliband's blog
http://blogs.fco.gov.uk/roller/miliband/entry/out_of_iraq_back_into


there is no such thing as "free society" - civilization is the opposite of freedom. but you know that. you know that to be governed is the opposite of freedom. you know that freedom is the number one enemy of the state. you also know that there exists no government that does not depend upon war, and that peace will only come about with the destruction of the heirarchical structure of "civilized" society, in other words, freedom. war is not peace, but freedom would be were we all not brainwashed to fear it so.

patriotism, ethnocentricity, or racism? is there any real distinction?

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/8008572.stm
http://blogs.fco.gov.uk/roller/miliband/entry/walkout


those rude, disrespectful bastards! their actions only prove to the world just how true the words of Ahmadinejad are.

questions for david miliband

as my comment may or may not be approved by the moderators on his blog at fco.gov.uk, i'm posting it here.

is in reply to the following blog:
http://blogs.fco.gov.uk/roller/miliband/entry/stop_hamas_kneecappings_and_beatings

which included a link to the following speech:
http://www.fco.gov.uk/en/newsroom/latest-news/?view=Speech&id=14331081


dear mr. miliband,

i don't understand how we are supposed to believe that the institutions which rely upon war in order to govern us all, how are we supposed to believe these governments are going to ever make the war stop?

likewise, i don't understand how the institutions which created this current economic crisis are expected to fix the problems that they created? how does this make any sense?

if i took my car to a mechanic, and in the process of fixing one problem, they created a worse one that caused the engine to explode, i don't think i would be taking my car back to that same garage again. would you? but this seems to be what the public is expected to accept without question, if the media is any indication of anything at all.

as far as helping those whose lives have been devastated by war, i think it would be far more effective to stop bombing the place. how does that fit in your plan? are we supposed to pretend that the huge sums currently being spent on waging war are justified by throwing some, in comparison much smaller, amount at humanitarian aid?

government is nothing more than words on paper, written by liars and thieves

originally posted at http://tpuc.org/forum/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=694

my family has a story, i bet yours does too, but it probably doesn't agree with the official history. my family's story turns history on its ear. everything they taught us in school is upside down and backwards. we can start in jamestown, since i know the paper trail goes at least that far back, but the story goes back much, much farther.

i pay taxes on a small piece of land that has been in my family since before white men came to north america. i'm still not sure why, or how this makes any sense. there was a settler at jamestown virginia who fell in love with and married a native woman. this isn't surprising, considering there weren't any other women around, only men and boys were allowed onboard seagoing vessels. ship captains were mighty superstitious about that. there's monsters in those waters, and women bleed. you don't want your little wooden boat smelling of blood, do you? oh no. well, anyway, this settler's wife, her family grew tobacco. he was making himself quite a little bundle selling the indian tobacco to the other settlers. and well, there was a dispute over the price he was charging them. so they locked him up in the boat there, to await trial. somebody in the family has his diaries. i've seen a photocopy of some of the pages. he mostly wrote about his wife, how beautiful she was, how intelligent she was, how fast she was learning to read and write english, what books they were reading. he asked john smith to bring back more books, when he returned from england with more supplies. he did not take the charges against him very seriously. they hung him without a trial, and brutalized his wife, left her for dead on the boat used as her husband's prison, adrift at sea. this is the story i was told. this is how government works. this is what was done to all of us, not just the native americans, but your ancestors, as well. she survived (which is more than you can say for most of the men at jamestown), and gave birth to twins...

in 1714 "Governor Spotswood appointed the Reverend Charles Griffin as schoolmaster to educate and christianize the Indian children in the first Christian Indian School in Virginia."
http://www.tourbrunswick.org/fort_christanna.htm

we were "christianized" and made to be ashamed. the spirits of our ancestors, who are here to help guide us and help us, we were told are suffering eternity in hell because they didn't pray to the right god.


"When I was a boy, the Sioux owned the world. The sun rose and set on their land; they sent ten thousand men to battle. Where are the warriors today? Who slew them? Where are our lands? Who owns them?"
~ Sitting Bull

on groupthink, or herd mentality

http://mamaboogie.gaia.com/blog/2008/10/your_god_is_not_my_god_or_dont_proselytize_at_me

[groupthink] involves believing that the members of your group are superior than people who are not in your group. (to say that some are “higher evolved” or “spiritually enlightened” is a prime example of this) groupthink also involves mind-control …. oh, but nobody wants to talk about that subject. i got some blogs i wrote, some articles i copied, too… mob enforcement of the rules. it involves giving away your freedom to act and think as you see fit in order to belong to the group. and that is my main problem, being an anarchist and all.

...

forming groups does not unify us, it divides us (us being all of humanity)! those who seek unity and world peace usually do so by forming some group or organization, and that act of separating themselves from others goes counter to the original intent of the group! but it feels good to be part of something, doesn't it? we don't want to be told how we are being manipulated and controlled, oh no, it's my choice, i'm doing the “right” thing, i care… yeah well, people need to start thinking about how the structure of our society harms humanity, rather than just taking it for granted that's how it is and how it should be and always will be.

...

seemingly everyone does it to some extent, everyone who justifies their beliefs with “the Bible says” … and you know good and well that is no different than “my teacher/guru says” … proselytizing is all the same religious indoctrination through fear of the consequences, regardless the outward appearance…. the worst are the ones who claim they don't do it, who think their religion is the ONE TRUTH that applies equally to all people, thus making it okay, this sort of religious exclusivism, it's even written into their rules (and they call it “helping” when they try to convert you to their beliefs)…

...

religion serves to prevent us from finding truth, within. sure, they say things to the contrary, they always do, them that tell lies. and the reason they tell those lies is because they are too afraid to find their own subjective truth, they feel that the objective Law that rules their lives should rule everyone's life. it's a lack of respect, mostly for themselves, they doubt their own ability to find their own truth. and it illustrates a profound lack of respect towards anyone and everyone who does not share their religious beliefs, to have this desire to convert, to preach their wisdom to others, thinking their subjective truth applies objectively to others.

it's about a lack of respect. gotta say it again, i suppose. because when you do find your own inner truth, it doesn't matter what anyone else says about it. you just KNOW. and knowing that your truth is not dependent upon what anyone else holds to be true, you gain respect for those who have found their own personal truth. this outrageous attempt to share your wisdom with others, to expect them to believe the things that are true for you, is symptom of a lack of connection to what is true. it's an ego thing.

...

communication is not about reaching a consensus and calling it “truth”
communication is about trying to find your own words to describe your own experience, so that you may share it with others. not to convert them to the truth of what you know, but to learn more about the things you don't know. <3

...

American Heritage Dictionary - Cite This Source - Share This
pros·e·ly·tize

To convert (a person) from one belief, doctrine, cause, or faith to another.



*****

brain·wash·ing
a method for systematically changing attitudes or altering beliefs



it's called euphemism… get a grip.
not only that, but brainwashing is when you attempt to change an adult from one beleif system to another. when it is done to children we call it “education”

it happens all the time, everywhere, people don't just lie to others, they lie to themselves. pretend that what they do is okay because everyone does it, or pretend they aren't doing what everyone else is doing, or justify them doing it, because it's different when we do it, we are the good people and they're the bad ones.

the original meaning of the word “anarchy” meant freedom. so why is it that myspace blocks any images with that word in the filename? it violates their terms of use, apparently they think it is “violent and offensive material”
why is freedom not allowed?

you crazy, bitch!

sanity simply means to act in accordance with what the majority of people consider to be socially-acceptable behavior. it's the measuring stick that says who is better at following other people's rules. to be labelled "insane" is the threat, the punishment, that keeps meek people in line, acting right, from fear of being a social misfit and outcast from the group.

http://mamaboogie.gaia.com/blog/2008/10/who_is_the_sanest_person_you_know

to think or not to think

http://www.tpuc.org/forum/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=462&st=0&sk=t&sd=a&start=30#p2703


to be given "beliefs" is to be either:

indoctrinated (what is done to children who have not established their own personal belief system)
brainwashed (when the same thing is done to adults who already have established beliefs)

this is why the modern education system fails. it is designed to prevent students from learning. our "education" is an attempt to prevent thought from happening. all information is pre-digested and downloaded, then regurgitated at will (such as when they are filling in little circles on those tests).

is this how you learn, how you think? are those thoughts your own, or are they straight from someone else, some authority (the Bible says... or as they say nowadays, my guru said...) instead of from that thinking part within you? i learn through experience, through my subjective perceptions of such personal experiences. anyone can memorize the times tables, but in order to multiply you must know how it works.

we are not machines, though we can choose to operate as such. that is our choice. to think or not to think. it's up to you. the abusive authority, the belief in groupthink, would threaten you with horrible consequences should you choose to think for yourself, but to allow the group or an authority to think for you is always your decision.

commentary

http://mamaboogie.gaia.com/blog/2009/1/for_i_know_that_the_hypnotized_never_lie_do_you

we all pay taxes. we know those tax dollars are being spent hand over fist to kill people who have never caused us any personal harm. we are complicit in our silence, in our consent to be governed by such a corrupt system that human lives are imagined to be expendable, in believing what we all know, deep down inside, are lies.

we knew all along that voting for obama was going to change nothing. we all knew it. we knew all along that it is utter foolishness to send money and warplanes to israel, so they can kill more palestinians. we all know it. we all know it’s wrong. propaganda exists, not to make us believe the lies, but to make us afraid to admit we disagree.

just look at the nonsense they want us to believe!! like the UN is going to stop a war that its very existence depends upon? nah… ain’t gonna happen cap’n. what needs to happen is to simply stop funding it. no more defense spending (defense, yeah right) no more war. simple. hellfire and damnation, no more defense spending, no more of that economic collapse they keep telling us about in the news….

we really could be free. we really could. so what is stopping us? i see no obstacle in the way. i only see masses of humans believing in obstacles that don’t really exist. i know. i know you know, too. problem i see is that there’s too many don’t know they know.

freedom, undefined

http://tpuc.org/forum/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=355&st=0&sk=t&sd=a

freedom, as i see it, means that i get to decide for myself. freedom, if it were real, would mean that nobody has higher authority over what decisions i make. freedom would mean that nobody gets to decide for me what i choose to do, or to think, or to believe is true. *and* freedom would mean that everyone, each individual person, deserves the same respect to make their own choices for themselves. i do believe in our ability to be free. not only that, but i see it as an essential need, this human instinct to be free.


http://tpuc.org/forum/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=465

freedom isn't about the majority. freedom is about each individual person choosing to stand in their own power, rather than giving that power away to abusive authorities, or to some group or organization, in the hopes they have our best interests at heart. can i realistically see humans choosing to be free? sure i can! not a problem. what i cannot realistically comprehend is how the current system that is based upon control and manipulation could ever sustain itself. it is doomed to fail from the get-go, as a flawed system it must collapse. the tricky part is, when it collapses, do we again allow another system based upon control to take its place? i believe everyone would rather be free than choose to be governed (govern means control), if they were aware that it is their choice to make for themselves.

send in the clowns

EU leaders agree on climate change deal

By CONSTANT BRAND, Associated Press Writer

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081212/ap_on_bi_ge/eu_eu_summit

BRUSSELS, Belgium – European leaders agreed Friday to stick to an ambitious plan to fight global warming through emissions cuts and renewable energy, and on ways to share the hefty costs of setting a global example.

The plan includes concessions to heavy industry and countries in Eastern Europe worried that the cost of curbing pollution would impede economic growth. The expense of the plan had caused uproar among many countries as the continent grapples with economic downturn.

The plan, agreed at an EU summit, lays out how the 27 member countries will cut carbon emissions by 20 percent by 2020.

French President Nicolas Sarkozy, who holds the bloc's rotating leadership, called the agreement historic and urged global partners to follow Europe's example at U.N. climate change talks in Poznan, Poland.

The French president says the 27-nation bloc has "now delivered" and it was "now the time" for others, including the United States and China, to follow suit.

"People will not follow Europe unless we set the example," he said.

EU Commission President Jose Manuel Barroso called the plans "the most ambitious proposals anywhere in the world."

"Europe has passed its credibility test," he said.

An EU deal could breathe new life into the U.N. climate talks, which were expected to wrap up Friday with a work plan for talks over the next year on a new global warming treaty. But that plan needs worldwide support.

The eyes of Europe's economic rivals were on the EU talks to see how the bloc manages to balance economic growth while keeping intact promises to rein in emissions.

"The overall political message that we have sent to the rest of the world is that Europe is taking the lead," Danish Prime Minister Anders Fogh Rasmussen said at a news conference after the talks, confirming that the leaders agreed on the climate package.

European diplomats haggled through the night on complex plans to fulfill promises made last year to meet so-called 20-20-20 targets: reducing greenhouse emissions by 20 percent and ensuring that 20 percent of energy comes from wind, sun and other renewable sources by 2020.

Desperate to get a deal, France backed several opt-outs to the strict reductions it wants industries to make. The opt-outs are aimed at heavy industry that might flee abroad to regions with looser environmental rules.

France also proposed leeway for countries very dependent on coal and oil for power generation — but the EU plan that this must be temporary.

The leaders also agreed on a euro200 billion ($258 billion) Europe-wide economic stimulus package to ease the effects of a recession. The downturn overshadowed talks on the costly climate deal.

(emphasis mine ~s)

Personal Responsibility

As a human Person and inhabitant of Planet Earth, I am hereby formally announcing that the corporation known as United States of America needs to be held accountable for its actions. According to its own laws, the government is guilty of heinous crimes against humanity in general, as well as many millions of individual persons both in the past as well as present day. The counts of murder, alone, are too numerous to ever be comprehensively documented.

How far in the red do the books have to go before such a corrupt corporate entity is forced to declare bankruptcy? Why has this not happened yet? What is wrong with us, We The People, that we would allow these atrocities to continue? Why did the entire world stand idly by and watch as the land was outright stolen from the original inhabitants of this continent? But stealing the land wasn't enough, it must be tamed, brought under human control, beaten into submission, just like The People.

I have been beaten, but I refuse to cower in fear and watch my children suffer the same abuses. I am a Person, first and foremost, I am not a slave. I am not the property of the state. I have within me a conscience, something corporations lack because they are not human. No corporate entity, not any government nor religious institution, has higher authority than the conscience that lies within each human Person. I am declaring all laws that would claim higher authority over my actions than my own conscience, null and void. I am my own authority. I signed no contract, I entered into no covenant, I uttered no spoken agreement to the terms of any objective Law. I am not obliged to obey the abusive authority of church and state.

the question was

What do you want from our leaders?

i want absolutely NOTHING from them!
i don't need them to tell me what to do.
i want to make my own decisions about my own life.
i would like for all authorities to recognize that
they can't make decisions for anyone but themselves.
i would like for everyone, not just the so-called leaders,
everyone to heal from past abuses and
childhood indoctrination into obedience and control.
and then we can all be free.

once there is no longer any government to support it,
war will cease to exist.
So this is my final answer to the question:
I WANT WORLD PEACE!!
i will accept nothing less than that, if they expect my support.
i have yet to find a leader worth following.
maybe they are out there somewhere.
hiding.

***

i do not believe in politicians. i do not believe people should vote to give their decision-making rights away to government. i do not believe anyone needs to be governed and ruled and controlled. i do not believe in majority rule. i believe everyone should be free.

fixing the old system which is broken is not a viable option. how can we depend on government to fix the problems it has created? we cannot. history shows us that. history shows that replacing the old rulers with new ones does not free anyone. we do not need to figure out a way of making the old system work, it won't work, it never has, and it never will. what needs to happen is we need to stop trying to control everything, and allow a natural system to emerge.

***

Building a new order is not the way. Allowing a natural order to emerge is the only answer that is not inherently flawed. It is mankind's sick desire to control everything that has gotten us into this mess. No human person is higher authority than any other person's innermost guide. We do not need to be governed, controlled, manipulated, and abused by authority figures who think they should make decisions for us. We can choose to be autonomous and free instead. It's a choice each person must make for themselves, though, else it just doesn't count.

Freedom is within our grasp. Please let us not screw it up by playing into that same control game that got us where we are today. Replacing the old rulers with new ones will not free anyone. History has shown us that, over and over and over again. It's time we learned from past mistakes and do things differently. For the children.

***

politicians are not leaders, they are rulers.
rulers are people who want to lead.
leaders are people others want to follow.
big difference.

another perspective

link

"As to their economical conceptions, the anarchists, in common with all socialists, of whom they constitute the left wing, maintain that the now prevailing system of private ownership in land, and our capitalist production for the sake of profits, represent a monopoly which runs against both the principles of justice and the dictates of utility. They are the main obstacle which prevents the successes of modern technics from being brought into the service of all, so as to produce general well-being. The anarchists consider the wage-system and capitalist production altogether as an obstacle to progress. But they point out also that the state was, and continues to be, the chief instrument for permitting the few to monopolize the land, and the capitalists to appropriate for themselves a quite disproportionate share of the yearly accumulated surplus of production. Consequently, while combating the present monopolization of land, and capitalism altogether, the anarchists combat with the same energy the state, as the main support of that system. Not this or that special form, but the state altogether, whether it be a monarchy or even a republic governed by means of the referendum.

The state organization, having always been, both in ancient and modern history (Macedonian Empire, Roman Empire, modern European states grown up on the ruins of the autonomous cities), the instrument for establishing monopolies in favour of the ruling minorities, cannot be made to work for the destruction of these monopolies. The anarchists consider, therefore, that to hand over to the state all the main sources of economical life - the land, the mines, the railways, banking, insurance, and so on - as also the management of all the main branches of industry, in addition to all the functions already accumulated in its hands (education, state-supported religions, defence of the territory, etc.), would mean to create a new instrument of tyranny. State capitalism would only increase the powers of bureaucracy and capitalism. True progress lies in the direction of decentralization, both territorial and functional, in the development of the spirit of local and personal initiative, and of free federation from the simple to the compound, in lieu of the present hierarchy from the centre to the periphery. "

how government works

first, you form a committee.
and this committee has to represent differing points of view
(for fairness, you know).
so everyone sits around arguing about what needs to be done
for a good long while.
once it is finally decided what needs to be done,
everyone sits around arguing about how to best get it done.

...and nothing ever gets done.

i believe in freedom

so i deleted a bunch of stuff. so what? it's just words, i have plenty more where those came from. today my thoughts are turning to FREEDOM, and it's been a while since i addressed this subject. so here goes...


I believe that:

• freedom is the ability to make decisions
• when we are not allowed to make our own decisions, we are not free
• governments and religions serve to prevent people the ability to make their own decisions by inventing external objective man-made rules, laws, commandments, if you will, rather than pointing out to them that the only place answers are ever to be found is within, through introspection.
• governments and religions and other such control-based human constructs such as mass media also serve to prevent people from being aware that it is up to them what they decide to do, to think, to believe, to act.
• the denial of people to make their own decisions is ABUSE
• all institutions that deny people the ability to decide things for themselves are ABUSIVE towards the very people who have been indoctrinated from childhood to believe those institutions are neccessary and good.
• GOOD vs EVIL is the root of all lies, a false distinction that was invented for the sole purpose of controlling people, effectively preventing them from making their own decisions.
• control-based institutions offer their subjects the false choice between two "sides" (take your pick, light vs darkness, liberal vs conservative, etc. ad infinitum)
• control-based institutions do not allow anyone to point out any other options (through control of mass media, education, and religion)
• people cannot make informed decisions if they are not informed nor allowed to decide.
• information is carefully controlled. whenever anyone speaks too much truth, there is widespread attempt to misdirect, misinterpret, and dumb it down for the masses who must not be allowed to realize that the choice is theirs to make.
• we have all been abused by the very government, education system, and mass media that we have been taught is for our own good.
• anyone who does not OBEY the rules, the laws, is said to be bad. it becomes a sin to question authority. threats are used to enforce obedience. you will go to jail, you will burn in hell for all eternity, you won't have any friends, people will think you are weird or strange, you will be labelled with some horrible label, whatever. be AFRAID! OBEY or else.
• unquestioning obedience to any external authority is the complete and total opposite of freedom.
• we have been so abused as to think we are not worthy of making decisions for ourselves
• we have been repeatedly told how bad we are, we were born sinners, we need to overcome our failings, there's something bad wrong with us if we aren't happy all the time, we are bad bad bad... and the abusive system is perpetuated.
• abuse begets more abuse. ...but not always. it's always YOUR choice whether to allow or deny another human the freedom we all deserve.
• lastly, i do believe that all people are "good" (because i do not believe evil exists except as a judgment people make about things and people that cause them harm) and that all people are perfectly capable of finding their own answers, making their own choices.

stupid government bullshit lies

Someone told me today not to call people stupid. Here is my response:

When people CHOOSE not to think, i feel justified in calling them stupid. They got these huge motherfucking brains they don't want to use. STUPID. I believe it's a choice, to be stupid, or to think, and there's no excuse for letting other people do their thinking for them. NO EXCUSE!! Even someone with a really limited brain capacity can think, if they want to. I know plenty of unintelligent people who are not stupid, because they choose to use what brains they got. And I know many more highly intelligent people who are just plain stupid and that's all there is to it.

the system we have is built on lies. the lies keep getting bigger and bigger, and it's just going to collapse on itself. it was never stable to begin with. the only system that can sustain itself would be built upon a natural order, rather than this human attempt to control things we currently have. you know, all that anarchy stuff i like to go on about. freedom, autonomy, the right to make our own decisions rather than constantly being told what we should do, what we should believe, how we should act... and all those rules and laws, they only serve to make us believe we are bad and make us afraid to look within to find our own truth. that's what it's all about, you know. Making our own decisions, based upon the truth we find inside rather than on what other people might think or say. And the one thing standing in the way of acheiving that kind of freedom is the fact that people would rather be told what to do than look within and find their own answers, it's easier, gives them someone else to blame when things go wrong. And i think it's just plain STUPID.

questions for today

imagine you knew, without a shadow of any doubt,
how and where you were going to die, but not when.

what questions would you ask yourself?

SHUT UP, BITCH!

why do my words

piss you off so much

they're just words is all

what are you so AFRAID of

muthafucka

Dear Sam,

Dear Sam,
You ain't my uncle and you can't tell me what to do. You are not a higher authority than my own personal Divinity. (Call it 'God' if that makes you feel better. I owe noone an explanation for my own personal beliefs.) I am an autonomous human being. I am not your slave nor your property. I do not need papers and numbers to identify me, I know who I am. I do not need your laws and religions that tell me I'm bad. I am claiming my right to make my own decisions for myself. You have no power over me anymore.

Spacey Stacy
anarchist bitch

dance with me

you come at night
the mist
swirling around me
and i, the wind
lift you up
to dance with the stars
we twirl and spin
swirling
faster
and faster
until my thunder
roars across the sky
and you let loose your
lightning bolts
and we both fall
back to earth
as gentle spring rain

i'm not gonna even try to change the world

it's about letting go of control. it's not about changing the world so much as it's about letting the world change itself. it's not so much about changing myself as it is about letting myself grow and change in my own way and in my own time. likewise for everyone else. you get it? surrender, trust, these are difficult concepts, especially for men... we are taught that is weak, is pitiful, is bad and wrong and sometimes even EVIL. but it's not. it's just that everything feminine has been villified by the male ruling elite for far too long. these false distinctions, these judgments we make about things, separating existence into digestible little chunks, it's all subjective anyway, only exists within the framework of our minds. (same with time and space, but that's a whole 'nother story)

i'm not gonna even try to change the world. what i'm gonna do is stop trying to control that change. that's what i think needs to happen. but everyone has gotta decide for themselves, else it don't count. there's things i gotta do, but not right now. right now i'm waiting for the people who are going to help me do those things i gotta do, because i can't do it alone. and that's okay, too. it's damn good, actually, to know i don't have to do it alone, to realize i'm not the only one the ancestors are calling to task. and it's still my decision to make, whether to listen to them or not. same as those others. but enough of us will listen, and we will do what they ask, and the world will change. because it has to. not because we make it happen, but because we finally get out of the way and let it happen.

all i know is that i perceive my experience to be bad when i choose not to listen to my inner guiding voice, my conscience, my spirit guide, whatever you wanna call it or however you wanna see it. i don't like the pain and suffering that comes when i listen to what other people say instead. so i gotta listen to him (and yes, he is a him, and he is separate from who i am, and there's nothing wrong with that) because my past experiences have taught me it is in my best interest to do so. i have to trust that all people have such an inner guide, a conscience, that tells them right from wrong. and that when offered the choice, they will choose not to hurt others anymore, but to do what is right.

and still, my words are all wrong, you know. i don't think in english. this language we are using is nowhere near complex enough to adequately express my thoughts. it's so very limiting. so everything i say is wrong and open to misinterpretation... but i keep trying. some people, like you maybe, understand what i'm about regardless what i say. other folks are never going to get it, no matter what i say. for me, putting it into words helps a lot. doesn't matter if i ever find the right words, it's the process of looking for them that makes such a difference.

another old post from my other blog

http://friendstacy.gaia.com/blog/2007/11/untitled
5 nov 2007

why was I chosen for this task the spirits have given me? this confounded me, haunted me, frightened me for most of my life. It wasn't so terrible as a small child, the spirits were my friends, my playmates, I knew they would never harm me. But when I got older, and realized that other people didn't know about these spirits, I learned to be afraid. I was terrified I'd be found out, that my friends might learn that I wasn't like them, that I was different, strange, a freak.

When the world laughed at Shirley Maclaine, I grew even more afraid. I dared not admit to anyone that I agreed with her and saw no cause for ridicule, and I became afraid to draw that ridicule upon myself. I did everything I could to fortify those walls I had already built between me and everyone else, to hide who I am from them out of fear.

And still the notion that invisible beings had some sort of hand in who I am, and wanted something from me, really bothered me. Why were they giving me these visions and dreams? I didn't want to be different. I just wanted left alone and to leave people alone. Until the children came along, I would have been perfectly happy to live out in the woods much as Thoreau did in his Walden experiment, except permanently. Alone, where I could commune with nature and the spirits and not have to worry about anyone thinking I'm crazy, delusional, insane, because there wouldn't be any other people around.

Was I chosen? Are we not all of us chosen? Is the only difference between us that I am not fighting it anymore, not trying to be like everyone else, okay with who I am, warts and all?

You don't have to believe what I believe is true. But I do. When I start to doubt, my pain comes back. I was hurting my entire life, and now that the pain is gone, I can't go back there again. I am happy now, and I like it so much better than the constant anger and rage that I always felt before. I do have a choice, and I have made my decision. It's entirely up to you what you choose to believe. Just remember that my beliefs cause harm to nobody, please do not try to harm me with what you believe to be true.

And really, all I want anyone to do is question their beliefs, not to negate them, but to find Truth, as truth stands up to scrutiny. Only false beliefs are harmed when people ask the difficult questions. I know that truth is so much larger than I am that I can never see the whole picture. I know that what is true for me may not be true for you, and that's OKAY! Just the act of trying to find it, that's what counts, that is what is going to set us all free!!

****************************************

“and now that the pain is gone, I can't go back there again.”

this bears repeating. This is why I *must* believe. I don't care whether anyone else believes or not, or if they think the government has put some sort of micro-chip radio in my head, or any other ludicrous notion along those lines. You should hear the doozies I've heard lately, other people trying to explain away and negate my personal experiences, just because they are afraid of that which they do not understand!

I find it much preferable to believe, and to not hurt anymore, than to doubt and live with the sort of constant pain I always experienced before. But hey, that's my choice! You don't have to agree with it. I really don't care. (that's not true, I do care, and I don't like seeing people in pain, but there's nothing I can do if they find the pain preferable than the journey within to face their own fears.)

DIVINITY

You are divine, my dear. You are made of the same stuff as galaxies! You are a Sun, you shine so bright. Do not fear that you will be blinded by looking at yourself. Go within, gaze at the brightness inside, unafraid of what you might find.

letter to a friend

the unnatural order of things can't last much longer. when people stop trying to control the world, a natural order will emerge, one that really works for everyone's best interest, rather than the best interest of only the few who rule. it's really gonna happen, Dave, and we'll live to see it!

i was given vision of three possible futures. we are now in one of them, and it's not one of the scary ones. i wish i could show you how wonderful this is, how certain i am of things i know are starting to happen now. it's just words anyway. i do believe. and i don't have those fears and doubts anymore. the spirits are very happy, and this makes me happy.

everything's gonna be okay, I just KNOW it is. It's not going to be easy, nothing ever is. But it will be lots of fun for those who don't fight it. be true to your spirit, it will never lie to you. Humans lie all the time, but true spirit doesn't. People try to make spirit a lie, what with santa clause and the tooth fairy, but those are just lies people tell. follow your inner guide and you can make your wildest dreams come true!!

love,
stacy

PLATITUDES

(not egg-laying mammals)

all those empty words
when i bared my soul
opened my heart to you
what did i get in return?

first you said one thing
then you said not so
then you said it was again
and you accuse ME
of toying with YOU?!!

i never asked you to share your “wisdom” with me
all i asked was your name

"ooooh, I'm so enlightened and full of love"

give me a forkin break. You love everyone so much it oozes out of your pores like the smell of stinky socks. get over yourself. you aren't better than anyone else just because you only think good thoughts. you aren't better than me because you don't ever get upset or feel anger. get a grip. you are denying the horrors of this world, call it illusion all you want, but is that going to feed that family with no food in their kitchen? How is calling it an illusion going to make the bruises on that child go away or stop hurting any sooner? Face it, life sometimes sucks. It's not all peaches and roses and whatever the trendiest herbal concoction is for today. And you know what? I don't need your religion that tells me how wrong I am to get upset when people starve or freeze to death, in their own homes!! I'm gonna get upset about it, and I'm gonna yell about it. And if you don't like it, cover your ears and hum "ohm shanti ohm shanti" whatever it is you say when you go to that zillion dollar spa in the himalayas. Somebody's got to speak out, and LOUDLY, because far too many are listening to your peace and love and kindness BS and not facing the cold hard facts that life isn't so pretty for most people in this world of ours. This world really SUCKS for a lot of people! It's time to get pissed off and do something about it, DAMMIT!

this is who I am. How is it your place to tell me to change? fuck a bunch of that crap. go on with your perfect self and your perfect life and your perfect world where nobody feels anything. My path is just as valid as yours, and I'm actually DOING something, not just talking a bunch of love and harmony crap that doesn't apply in the real life world.

LOL
check this out: http://www.lifesucks.info/
gotta laugh, else I'd just sit here and cry…

hey, y'all that want to preach LOA to me, do me a favor and go ahead and remove me from your friends list. I'm over it. I'm sick of it. Nothing you say is going to change who I am or what I believe. And nothing I say is going to make you understand my big problems I have with religions that make you afraid to be human, tell you what to believe, what to think, and how to act, in order to be “good”because I believe all people are good, we just sometimes make mistakes.I do not believe in EVIL. I recognize it was invented by Plato for the ruling elite to more effectively govern the masses. If you don't want to recognize true history, if you insist on believing the lies, go away and leave me the fuck alone already.

Several people lately felt it their place to proselytize at me. NOTHING pisses me off more than that sort of holier-than-thou if only you believed what I believe you wouldn't be such a mess crapola they feed the sheep who don't want to think for themselves. I don't care what your religion is, it's not mine, keep it to your own damn self if you think I should change my beliefs because they aren't the same as yours. Fuck that. I love talking about religion, that's not the problem, it's when people think I should believe theirs that pisses me off so much. Or when they think my religious beliefs can be defined with their religion, that's even worse. That's cultural genocide, no matter how you look at it. Why does your religion need to fit my beliefs anyway? I don't have any need to force my beliefs down anyone else's throat. I don't need to define your religion in terms of my own.

they won't listen. Their MASTER has given them TRUTH, and carved it in stone perhaps for the sole purpose of beating it upside people's heads. They take it upon themselves to tell me what's wrong with me, without bothering to read a single word I've written. They want me to know their truth, but turn a deaf ear to mine. That's why I figured I was safe posting about it here, they don't bother reading anyone's words but their own. ANd they call themselves “friends”

... I thought it was funny. HA! and this is my blog, and why do I have to always post things that makes you feel good? you know? sometimes I don't wanna feel good, sometimes I DON'T feel good, and why can't I blog whatever the hell I want to? Plenty of zaadsters like to blog about your religions, that tell me I'm “bad” because I think unhappy thoughts sometimes, or that I'm going to burn in hell for all eternity because your Jesus didn't die for my sins, or because my Momma was not the right bloodline, or whatever. Just because I disagree with the religion, doesn't mean I'm attacking anyone personally. Now, if they feel attacked by my words, that's their fuckin problem, not mine.


I was not attacking anyone in particular, but a certain way of thinking about things that is predominant in our society, and has even snuck into our cozy little bubble here at zaadz. If my rant offends, that is only because you choose to see yourself in my words, not because I intended any disrespect to you in particular, or anyone else for that matter. I'm attacking the notion of Universal Absolutes, that there is some sort of objective Truth that applies equally to all people. I don't buy it. That idea has been used for ages by those in power to retain control of the people. I'll not drug myself into a state of non-thinking by accepting such nonsense as true.

I own my words, all of them. I meant every single word of it. This is who I am. I do not speak untruths. I am not able to do so. THAT's what my religion is all about, and I don't need it to be defined in terms of anyone else's beliefs. That's my whole point with this post. You don't know what I believe to be true, and you certainly cannot tell me that your Truth applies to my reality. AND… just because this is true for me, doesn't make it true for anyone else. It's all about ME. This is my blog. This is why I blog, to talk about ME, to find out more about myself. It's all about an inward journey, for me, at least for now, anyway.

edit one more time:
“possibly, you could speak to those who offend you directly instead of vaguely ranting at them. that takes courage though.”
done that, they delete my comments on their blogs most every time. :-) So I have to share my words here, on my own blog instead.
but sometimes, they don't delete my words, and we enter into the most amazingly insightful email conversations!!

why Ron Paul ain't no better'n them rest of 'em

Ron Paul will win. And it won't matter who or how many vote for him. They've already decided, and they're feeding it to us bit by bit, slowly, so the sheeple won't be suprised when it is announced. It doesn't matter who you vote for!! It's a LIE! Your votes are never counted!! That has been proven TWICE now, already. Are we going to fall for it a third time? I'm not.

This grassroots movement is also a LIE! It's the new propaganda, and it's sneakier than the old kind, and it's really working, else you all wouldn't be here spouting off about some politician gonna fix the government that is far too broken to ever be fixed. Voting for Ron Paul means you think the system is fixable and that it can work. Thing is, the system was never intended to work!! It never did work and it never will. Bush didn't win either election, yet he's been president seven years now. What is wrong with this picture?

USA is not a democracy, it is a Republic, just like Plato explained. It's not about what is good for us, it's about making us think we want the abuse those in power dish out. The constitution never gave anyone freedom, the sole purpose was to make the people willingly give away their freedoms for the good of the state.

Ron Paul is just the only alternative they are offering us to a militaristic police state. Who can possibly choose anyone else? It's a trick. You have your choice between bad, really really bad, and criminally insane. We'd all be insane to elect the other two options, who can argue that? And since when has a candidate's campaign promises ever made a hill of beans of difference? It is your choice to believe the lies or not. Same as it is mine. I refuse to be manipulated by a phoney sense of making a difference, when voting means you give up your right to do anything about the government yourself, putting your faith in someone else. Be the change doesn't mean vote for someone else to do it for you. Do it yourself.

here's an example: say there's a pothole in the street outside your house. You have several options available to you. You can sit at home and call the government, expecting someone to eventually come around and fix the problem. You can stand out in the street yelling at the top of your lungs about it. Or you can get up off your sorry ass, grab a shovel, and fill the hole yourself. Voting amounts to waiting for someone else to fix the problem. Protesting amounts to screaming in the streets. A real change means people actually doing something themselves to make a difference. The choice is yours, and mine, and everyone else's, to make for ourselves, each of us.

**************************************

they have been spinning it so's to make us accept Ron Paul as our next President. I have no doubt they intend for him to “win” (but we all know, deep down inside, they don't even count our votes). Ron Paul is the new frontman, no less a puppet than Ronald Reagan, representing the same global ruling elite. The new propaganda uses personal blogs and forwarded emails to create a certain public image, and to present as facts anything they want us to think. They tell us he's the only alternative to a militaristic police state. They tell us the Constitution guarantees us freedom. It's all LIES! The government is what caused all the problems, how can anyone expect government to fix the problems it created in the first place?!!

liberal vs. conservative - a false distinction

Due to recent issues with my blogs at gaia.com (formerly zaadz) and at myspace, I will now undertake the task of copy and pasting whatever things I said those places that I want to keep in case those other blogs get disappeared or something.
mmmm...kay

the division of politics into “right” and “left,” “liberal” and “conservative” is a false distinction. Both sides are pro-government, in support of the very system that enslaves the people. Fighting amongst ourselves over such false divides is what prevents us from doing anything about the situation we find ourselves to be in. If we are for the people, we must necessarily be against government. Government serves the ruling elite, there is no denying that fact any longer, if it ever were possible (because people have been having these same discussions for many centuries, if not longer). Government serves The State, which power comes from individual people sacrificing their own individual freedoms for the good of the group. Well, as Thoreau said, when the people no longer need government, there will no longer be any government. And then Santayana and Pierce and James and those folks took up the chorus, added a few new ideas, and then later, King and Kennedy and them folks, too. It's nothing new, what I'm talking about. It's just that so few people ever feel comfortable discussing such matters. People don't like being told of how they are slaves, willing slaves, and how their lives are not free. People get very angry, upset, and often violent when you try to tell them these truths. They would much prefer to believe in an illusion of freedom, call it Liberty or Justice if you must, those things only resemble freedom in that is what they want you to believe. But it's up to you, each one of us, to decide for ourselves what to believe. I'm not believing all the lies anymore, I can't go back now, I've come too far to turn around and just give up hope.

some interesting links

check them out!

http://www.knowledgedrivenrevolution.com/

http://www.oldthinkernews.com/index.html

http://memes.org/blog/juxtaposeur

http://www.informationliberation.com/

SNAKE

it wants to consume me
and I'm afraid
do I have to do this alone?

world piece

make me make that sound
you know the one
take me to that place
the one only you and I know
to hell with the rest of the world
let's just hole up and fuck

I believe in you

You do have the ability to know the difference between right and wrong. You can make your own decisions. There is no higher authority than that of your own conscience. The only thing that really matters is that you not do anything that would hurt anyone else. Treat everybody with the respect you expect in return. With freedom comes the chance you might make mistakes, and that's okay, too. We all make mistakes from time to time. Funny, though, when I look back on the mistakes I have made in the past, I find that most of them were when I allowed someone else to decide for me rather than following my heart. And sometimes, I do need help, but I trust my heart to help me find the right leader to follow, always.

on freedom

would like to share with you all a little something I posted here:
http://friendstacy.gaia.com/blog/2008/1/from_lakota_oyate_with_comments

Greetings, everyone. I have many new friends here, you might not have read much of what I like to blog about. I'm an anarchist. I don't believe in governmental rule, period. This is how I interpret those truths revealed to me by my ancestors when I seek within for the answers. My ancestors, for the most part, are Lakota. I have to believe that there are other people in this world that share my viewpoint, but I can only take it on faith that they do, as they never replied when I asked for their assistance in the past. So this is my own personal truth, truth I found when I look within for answers. It does not come from the teachings of any human person, any book of ancient wisdom, any religious doctrine or political treatise.

I speak only for myself, from my heart. A very human heart. I believe in freedom. I believe it can really work, people can be free if they so choose to be. It is up to each individual person to make that decision, it cannot be made for them by others. THIS is my big problem with the world we live in today. Our decisions are all pre-made by those in control. We aren't granted autonomy, but sometimes the illusion of a choice is offered us. That makes people feel a little better and helps them sleep at night. I feel this current situation is unacceptable! I don't want the illusion of choices between options which represent false distinctions and are really all the same.

so, given the choice between Russel Mean's REPUBLIC and Bush's tyranny, who can possibly choose Bush? wrong. a new republic means nothing changes. a new republic means that Plato's plan for humanity is still in place. Government control of the people is not an option, no matter how sugar-coated it might be. In order to explain myself, I have to start with Plato. and we have to look into conspiracy theories that might make us uncomfortable. We have to learn about the globalist ruling elite, those few who run the whole show. And we have to search for truth in history, because most of it is lies. But most importantly, we have to break free of the operant conditioning from the indoctrination centers we know as schools and church.

We have to question our education first of all!! We must question all of it, every thing we hold to be true. We must ask "why do I believe this is true?" and if the answer is only because they told me to believe it, or if they threatened me with horribleness if I chose not to believe it, that means there are more questions that need to be asked.

My quest is not one for answers, but rather one for QUESTIONS!! I'm nowhere near learning Truth and Wisdom, or reaching some imaginary "enlightenment" - not me!! I'm still tearing down the false ideas I always thought were true. Things I was misled to believe. And as the lies crumble down, truth is left standing tall and strong and permanent.

Problem is, where those lies originated. The lies are told by those who seek to rule. They must lie to us in order to make us believe we want to be ruled. the parallels between politics and domestic violence are horrendous. They tell us we are stupid. They beat it into our brains with television and the non-stop onslaught of advertisements telling us to buy something. What they want us to buy aren't just the crap goods made by child slave labor in countries far far away. What they want us to buy is the whole package, this system that makes us slaves to the few in charge. and they're real good at it, too. Been doing it this way over 2000 years!

They make all decisions for us. Here are your rules, The Law. OBEY. Do not question authority, ever! If you do, horrible horrible things will happen to you. You might even spend eternity burning in hell. Plato planned it all out this way, check it out. The Republic isn't a difficult read, and you can find it online for free or at any public library. Plato's plan was to make the idea of the "good of the group" more important than anything else in society. this is how they get us to choose not to decide. Yes, it is a choice we make when we give the power to make decisions over to an authority. And I'm not saying that is always wrong. What I'm saying is that it is wrong when we are lied to in order to get us to make that choice. I'm saying it is wrong when someone chooses to rule others. What needs to happen is each person needs the freedom to make their own decisions, including the decision to follow any given leader at any given time for any given reason of their own. What needs to happen is for people to just simply start making their own decisions.

I do very strongly believe that people have the ability to be self-governing and not need government rule. Lots of other people have believed this throughout history, too. Lots of very intelligent, very highly respected people. Why is it that we still have government? What are we so afraid of that we can't trust ourselves and our fellow humans?

and back to Plato, just one last time. He left us a way out. Not by what is in The Republic, but what is missing from it. There is no mention of Socrates' Daimonion, his inner guiding voice, in all of The Republic. But it is a major part of most all other Socratic dialogues. This is our way out!! All we gotta do is listen to that inner voice that tells us right from wrong. The answer is right before us, ALL of us, each and every one! The only possible place you will ever find Truth, is from looking within. It's not from following the right poitician who claims to be fighting the corrupt system that supports his own extravagant way of life, or following the right general into battle. It's not from listening to the right guru or believing in the right god. It's not from praying the right way or meditating on the right mountain or with the right people. It's something each person must decide for themselves.

It's up to you. What kind of world do your children deserve to inherit? Make it happen. Don't do what anyone else tells you to do, do what your heart says is right.